


welcome to the end (rise and fall again)

by d_fenestrate



Series: spn s15 codas [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Coda, Emotions, Episode: s15e01 Back and to the Future, Gen, Season/Series 15, Song fic, The Famous Final Scene, and he's afraid, castiel is overwhelmed by emotions, episode coda, partially
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2019-10-17
Packaged: 2020-12-21 11:17:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21074036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/d_fenestrate/pseuds/d_fenestrate
Summary: “Chuck,” Dean had said, turning to face Sam and Castiel. “He said ‘Welcome to the end’ What…” There was a still pause, Castiel remembered. One that was accompanied by an extreme wave of worry. “What did that mean?”It was at this moment that Dean had turned to face Castiel directly.It was at this moment that Castiel had simply shrugged, indicating that he didn’t know.Back in the car, drive away from the graveyard, Castiel leaned back into his headrest and closed his eyes tightly.He did. He did know.The faint lights of another stray car on the road reflected off of Castiel’s crestfallen face. The angel remained still, eyes opening as the lights came close quickly, leaving in just about the same fashion.He knew.alt; Castiel knew what Chuck meant by "Welcome to the End". This is his internal response to it.





	welcome to the end (rise and fall again)

**Author's Note:**

> hello! 
> 
> look at me!!! publishing a coda!!! the day of the next episode!!! (at least i'm getting it in before the new episode tho haha)
> 
> here's a short coda i took notes for last week but only got time to write it at 3 am today. it's very loosely edited and, due to my own creative block, a little on the ??? end. i hope it's not as dry as i think it is (wow i'm really promoting myself well rn, aren't i). 
> 
> nevertheless, i hope you enjoy it! it's been a week or so and i'm still not over the fact that they opened the last season with "The Famous Final Scene" by Bob Seger. hence, this mini song fic of a part of the first verse. 
> 
> i would HIGHLY suggest listening to the song whilst reading this. i'm planning on saving the whole song for a final end of the season coda. idk.

The doors were shaking as the hellish ghosts continued to bang furiously against the iron-studded wood. 

Castiel stood frozen in the middle of the room, looking frantically around the crypt, finding nothing but dark and gloom. Jack’s body laid lifelessly on the floor, the faint silhouette visible in Castiel’s periphery. Overwhelmed with his own emotions and the continuous battering of the door, the angel continued to look away and about, finding himself more and more lost than he had ever been. 

To either side of him, Sam’s and Dean’s voices carried over through his haze. Castiel tried to follow the conversation the brothers were having, his eyes wide and breathing shallow. Rather than forming into actual words to the angel’s awareness, the information of the exchange melded with the muddle of Castiel’s perception. 

He vaguely remembered Dean asking a question. He vaguely remembered shrugging in a futile attempt to reply to the equally anxious hunter. Dean’s anxiety at that moment had been through the roof, radiating off of the human, the emotion spilling into Castiel’s space as well. Processing the extra wave of feeling, the shrug was little to no help, leaving the three stuck. 

Later, much later, as Dean drove Baby away from the crypt, Sam in the passenger, Belphegor in the back with him, Castiel found himself actually remembering the question. 

“Chuck,” Dean had said, turning to face Sam and Castiel. “He said ‘Welcome to the end’ What…” There was a still pause, Castiel remembered. One that was accompanied by an extreme wave of worry. “What did that mean?” 

It was at this moment that Dean had turned to face Castiel directly. 

It was at this moment that Castiel had simply shrugged, indicating that he didn’t know. 

Back in the car, drive away from the graveyard, Castiel leaned back into his headrest and closed his eyes tightly. 

He did. He did know. 

The faint lights of another stray car on the road reflected off of Castiel’s crestfallen face. The angel remained still, eyes opening as the lights came close quickly, leaving in just about the same fashion. 

He knew. 

_Think in terms of bridges burned_

And he knows. 

He knows what it means. The message becomes more and more clear when the angel finds himself unable to heal Sam’s wound, the dark energy of the injury overtaking him almost immediately. 

Sam’s dismissive of the issue, his gait staggered and cautious.

Castiel is worried, looking at Sam with concerned eyes. He knows, and the knowledge brings him nothing but worry. 

_Think of seasons that must end_

Fighting the ghosts only to trap them, ultimately signing off on yet another nearly unresolvable issue, leads Castiel to another wave of realization. 

The stakes are high. Oh, so high. 

They’re running, the angel realizes, his hand held by the frantic mother. They’re running, running away from the problem and towards what was a false and temporary place of security. 

Temporary. That’s the key term that rushes through Castiel, perpetuating the dread that had been in him all along. 

“Welcome to the end.” 

And Castiel knows. 

You can’t run away from the end. 

_See the rivers rise and fall_

Castiel steps away from Belphegor, Dean’s sudden moment of care and dismissal reeling in his head. He walks and walks and walks—not too far, but not too close, finding himself looking for sanctuary in the school’s play area. 

There’s a bench to the side of the lonely playground. It’s cold and empty, and, as if per instinct, the angel takes his seat on the lonely bench, hands held politely on his lap. He straightens his back. 

And he watches. He watches the empty world in front of him go around. 

Images of the graveyard, of the bodies and of the ghosts and their kill count flash through Castiel’s head. 

“Welcome to the end” Castiel hears the phrase in Dean’s voice, laced with the same scared and frantic tone as before. 

Images of Jack, Belphegor, Dean, and Sam flash in Castiel’s head, adding fuel to the fire.

It’s all too much. The overwhelming emotions and feelings from earlier rise with Castiel again, driving the angel to crouch over, shut his eyes, and hold his head in his hands. 

And he starts to shake. 

A part of him shakes as he thinks of the energy in Sam’s wound. A part of him shakes as he thinks of Jack and his ultimate fate. A part of him screams as he thinks of all that had happened between him and Dean. 

It isn’t until his memories settle on a certain voice that Castiel’s tremblings cease to a freeze. 

“Welcome to the end.” 

Chuck. 

“Welcome to the end,” Castiel whispers. He brings his head up and looks straight ahead at nothing. 

He knows what it means. And it frightens him, chilling him down to the weak essence of his remaining grace. 

This is it. 

This is the end. 

And that is final, Castiel finds himself believing. There’s nothing but the end. 

How do you run away from the end? 

How do you defeat _the end_? 

Perhaps it was due to his crush of faith in seeing his father dawn on them what was simply their own annihilation that had led Castiel to the point of disbelief. Back on the bench, the angel finds himself doubting again, feeling the agony of the familiarly confusing feelings. 

Sighing, the angel shakes his head, unsure of how he and the brothers were going to—as Dean would say— “bounce back” from this one. 

Moments pass and he reaches nowhere in his efforts of thinking. The overtaking emotions were still present, clouding the angel’s reasoning. 

How will they do it? Castiel wonders, standing up from the bench. The play area is still empty, almost lifeless. Even in the faint winds, the swings to the end don’t dare to swing. 

The angel keeps looking on forward, still and unable to bring himself to move. 

And so he doesn’t, hands in his pocket, frozen in spot. 

How were they going to do it? How were they going to beat this? 

_Could_ they even beat the end?

_They will rise and fall again_

Castiel walks back from his moment at the bench. His hands are still in his pockets, his gaze held low. He stops at a distance, raising his head to look over what seemed to be a bittersweet interaction between Sam and Dean. 

He sees Dean smile, Sam smile, and then each of the smiles fall. 

Had Castiel been smiling, his smile would’ve fallen as well. 

And so, he just stands present in his spot, knowingly. 

Could they?

_Everything must have an end_

He needs to hold onto what he’s got, Castiel realizes as he reenters the Impala. All three of them were present but not completely engaging, each of their avoidance of comment and conversation overtaking the air. A few moments in, Belphegor goes silent, reading the tension of the car. 

The day turns into evening with the residents of the town kept away safely in the high school. Tired and on-edge, the Impala revs out of the parking lot, turning straight for the high school, towards the direction of the cage of ghosts they had just created. 

As the four of them drive off with the car remaining silent and the sky changing colors in the background, Castiel knows. 

This was it. 

This was the end. 

And he hated and feared it all at once. 

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you liked it! visit me at tumblr/twitter for more rambles, posts, gifs, and yeah 
> 
> tumblr: uselessspork.tumblr.com  
twitter: twitter.com/uselessspork


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